Short story competition: seven- to 11-year-olds winner announced!
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From the crazy to the cute, the unlikely to the action-packed, the judges have read them all. And the winner is…
Children used this illustration as inspiration for their story
More than 1000 children entered this age category, and the judges spent the best part of a week reading the entries. They were incredibly impressed with all the children’s work – and suspected that many of the children may turn out to be the next generation of writers!
Some of the more memorable entries included: a Kung-fu panda meeting Jackie Chan; a penguin becoming prime Minister of Poland and solving unemployment; Sharon Osborne signing the zoo up to appear on X-Factor; animals going back to the wild; animals entering the zoo from the wild; penguins becoming nuns; nuns becoming penguins; chimps winning the lottery; penguins actually being super spies from Russia; and blind rhinos.
However, one story stood out from the crowd and that was by Holly Shutter from Moorlands Primary School in Huddersfield.
Holly, aged nine, expressed such a clear voice in her writing style that the judges were gripped from the start when they read ‘The Day I Ran the Zoo’. They also admired the way Holly could sustain a whole story in the first person narrative. The judges agreed the tone of the humour was just right, especially the line, ‘Can I just warn the lady in the cheap orange jumper…’! A real career as an observation writer in the making!
The two runners-up for this category are Catherine Caruth from Leweston Prep School in Dorset and Daniel Hudson from St Wystans School in Derbyshire.
Catherine, aged 11, wrote a moving and mature story about ‘The Little Hippo’ who tied balloons around his body so that he could float up to heaven and visit his father, who had recently died. The judges admired the way Catherine chose to write about a difficult topic – and still ended the story on a positive note.
The other runner-up, Daniel, adopted a wonderfully light-hearted approach when he wrote ‘Make your Mind up Jerry!’ The judges felt the story, about a giraffe who can’t decide what colour his spots should be, would make a wonderful picture book for young children. It really conjured up great visual images in the mind – and it’s quite clear now that giraffes shouldn’t go changing their spots!
Highly commended
The judges also commend the following children for their super stories:
- Nicholas Jones, a Year 6 child from King’s St Albans School in Worcestershire
- Ellen Hodgetts, another Year 6 child from King’s St Albans School in Worcestershire
- Safia Khan, aged nine, from Skellington St Lawrence Primary School in Lincoln
- Children in the Year 5 literacy set at Watton Junior School in Thetford
- Cressida Williams from Leweston Prep School in Dorset
- Paul Fredericks, aged ten, from Woodford Green Prep School
- Ellie Reidford, aged ten, from Markethill School in Aberdeenshire
- Victoria Brown, aged eight, from Hill House St Mary’s in Lincoln
- Cameron Thomson, aged 11, from Larkswood Primary School in London
- Poppy Atwell from Heatherton House School in Buckinghamshire
- Hannah Walker, aged nine, from St Edmund’s Catholic Primary in Surrey
- Katelyn Crooks, aged eight, from Ballycarrickmaddy Primary in Lisburn
- Alice Roberts from Hale Prep School in Cheshire
- Shivani Kotecha from Heatherton House School in Buckinghamshire
- James, a Year 4 child from Netherthorpe Primary School in Sheffield.
Published 15 May 2008
Reviews
Rated 4/5 from 60 ratings
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Tru
on 17 October 2016Again?
Can we please do this competition again, Im 9 and I really enjoyed writing a story with 100 words
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Amy lord
on 24 January 2016Stories
There all good
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Lucas Gregory Lester AKA MinecraftNerd11
on 24 October 2015Review Of The Three Stories
I believe, as an 11-year old, that the 2nd place story should have been in first place.
i am not trying to be really judgy. just an opinion! -
Lucy
on 21 July 2015Well done
I loved all your stories. I'm 13 and I love to write books
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ghananshu
on 1 July 2015well done
amazing stories maybe do the competition again
5out of 5 -
TRINTY
on 4 March 2015OH GOD
ZOOS ZOOS MOOS MOOS BOOS BOOS
THE SOUNDS PEOPLE MAKE WHEN AN ANIMAL IS LET LOOS -
ingrid xo
on 26 January 2015c:
these are great
i like writing too but about more serious topics -
Mrs. Matcherson
on 28 November 2014The Little Hippo
The idea seemed very sophisticated especially for someone
As young as eleven. However, I thought the writhing
Itself could improve. I am a teacher at a local elementary
School and a few kids I teach have already progressed
Farther in there writing ability than this young author. Though
It appears as if she had potential and I urge her to continue
On her way through the art of words and sentences.2out of 5 -
Imo Wiseman
on 14 September 2014The Day I Ran The Zoo
I think it is a well written story & I would read it if it was a book & have it on my shelf. Only, next time I would make it longer but apart from that I think it was awesome & amazing :)
5out of 5 -
Kyli
on 9 March 2014Help
I NEED u to tell me if there are any short story ontests that are for ages 11. I'm 11, and writing is my life
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Malorie Blackman
on 6 July 2013bookablog
These are amazingly wonderful I am speechless it makes my heart glow with joy to read such superb work! I hope it carries on as reading more of these stories puts a gigantic smile on my face, almost like the Cheshire's cat grin from Alice in Wonderland.
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Neve
on 3 May 2013Amazeballs!
The stories are great! Epic!! i wish i could write like that! I sometimes write little fairy stories when i get bored, good story ideas!!
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Verity
on 20 April 20139 year old sensation
The winner's story was amazing considering the fact she is only 9. The language was funny and really sophisticated! Well done Holly Shutter verity x
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Lizzie beast
on 12 April 2013the little hippo
a great little story. you did what all good writers do !!!! you made your reader feel various different emotions such as sadness , happiness,relief,panic e.t.c
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keeley
on 26 March 2013the 3 little cats
once a poller time 3 cats was in a house one cat was black and white the other two was black they was all brothers and sisters 1 girl called poppy and the other two was boys jack and tom tom was the fatest cat and the girl poppy was the scinest and shes allways scared jack came to the rescue and licked to make her brave again tom watched the tv football and thats how the three little cats start of but at the end of this story is a cute story about the cats all three of them went on a date having speggetie and the all kissed because they had the same speggetie the end
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kiran
on 18 February 2013i like them all
Children used this illustration as inspiration for their story
More than 1000 children entered this age category, and the judges spent the best part of a week reading the entries. They were incredibly impressed with all the children’s work – and suspected that many of the children may turn out to be the next generation of writers!
Some of the more memorable entries included: a Kung-fu panda meeting Jackie Chan; a penguin becoming prime Minister of Poland and solving unemployment; Sharon Osborne signing the zoo up to appear on X-Factor; animals going back to the wild; animals entering the zoo from the wild; penguins becoming nuns; nuns becoming penguins; chimps winning the lottery; penguins actually being super spies from Russia; and blind rhinos.
However, one story stood out from the crowd and that was by Holly Shutter from Moorlands Primary School in Huddersfield.
Holly, aged nine, expressed such a clear voice in her writing style that the judges were gripped from the start when they read ‘The Day I Ran the Zoo’. They also admired the way Holly could sustain a whole story in the first person narrative. The judges agreed the tone of the humour was just right, especially the line, ‘Can I just warn the lady in the cheap orange jumper…’! A real career as an observation writer in the making!
The two runners-up for this category are Catherine Caruth from Leweston Prep School in Dorset and Daniel Hudson from St Wystans School in Derbyshire.
Catherine, aged 11, wrote a moving and mature story about ‘The Little Hippo’ who tied balloons around his body so that he could float up to heaven and visit his father, who had recently died. The judges admired the way Catherine chose to write about a difficult topic – and still ended the story on a positive note.
The other runner-up, Daniel, adopted a wonderfully light-hearted approach when he wrote ‘Make your Mind up Jerry!’ The judges felt the story, about a giraffe who can’t decide what colour his spots should be, would make a wonderful picture book for young children. It really conjured up great visual images in the mind – and it’s quite clear now that giraffes shouldn’t go changing their spots!
Highly commended
The judges also commend the following children for their super stories:Nicholas Jones, a Year 6 child from King’s St Albans School in Worcestershire
Ellen Hodgetts, another Year 6 child from King’s St Albans School in Worcestershire
Safia Khan, aged nine, from Skellington St Lawrence Primary School in Lincoln
Children in the Year 5 literacy set at Watton Junior School in Thetford
Cressida Williams from Leweston Prep School in Dorset
Paul Fredericks, aged ten, from Woodford Green Prep School
Ellie Reidford, aged ten, from Markethill School in Aberdeenshire
Victoria Brown, aged eight, from Hill House St Mary’s in Lincoln
Cameron Thomson, aged 11, from Larkswood Primary School in London
Poppy Atwell from Heatherton House School in Buckinghamshire
Hannah Walker, aged nine, from St Edmund’s Catholic Primary in Surrey
Katelyn Crooks, aged eight, from Ballycarrickmaddy Primary in Lisburn
Alice Roberts from Hale Prep School in Cheshire
Shivani Kotecha from Heatherton House School in Buckinghamshire
James, a Year 4 child from Netherthorpe Primary School in Sheffield.
The Day I Ran the Zoo by Holly Shutter
Hi, I’m Emma. I’m 15 years old. Today’s my work experience. It’s at the zoo, I love animals. The colour of the zoo uniform – mustard – is disgusting! Oh well sacrifices have to be made! Another thing, I’m up for any challenge!It’s through the staff entrance, I’ll get used to this! Now what first? Open the zoo? But staff should be here to do that, it’s so tempting! Let’s have a look around, a note?
“Dear Emma, we heard you were coming so we took a break! We’re in Ibiza! Good luck from the zookeepers. P. S. Open the zoo!”
Open the zoo, me? I go to the Control Room, here is my map, I’ll never forget this moment! I’ll sit on the big leather chair! This is the microphone to speak to the visitors, this is the lever to open the zoo! Well I must do it right and make an annoucement.
“Hello and welcome to the zoo. Have a lovely time and enjoy our animals.”
It looks like a school’s arrived. What are those nuns doing, hold on, one’s a penguin, who let it loose? Oh, the microphone,
“Excuse me, whoever let the penguins loose will be punished. So… STOP!!!!!!!!!”
What’s next? I’m seeing things, a tea party for chimpanzees! And that isn’t right; elephants scared of a few mice? I need to make an announcement,
“Stop this, the monkeys wont have got out themselves! And little girls should not be playing with crocodiles or lions! Thanks!”
They can’t take a hint because someone has let a hippo go up and away! On balloons!!! And isn’t that a… SHARK!!!! I really advise that boy to get off the hippo and run! And that boy should put the plug back in now!!! Things are getting worse!!!
Lunch – here’s my map and the cafe is on the second floor. Chocolate cake and coke. I’ve got it all around my face, well it was nice.
Back to work, what’s happened? A ninja panda in the trees; what did he learn those nifty moves? And why is there an optician in the rhino enclosure? Well I suppose it’s for the best. He might not be able to see his food.
There’s a boy in the gorilla enclosure and a gorilla in a pram. Maybe the mum got fed up and swapped them on purpose. I must warn her though.
“Can I just warn the lady in the cheap orange jumper that there is a gorilla in her pram and her son is in the gorilla enclosure, thanks.”
She looks angry. Anyway she’s got her son back so that’s fine, but she’s keeping the gorilla. What will her husband say? There’s also a painter who’s painting the giraffes red!
“Can the man wearing the blue helmet please stop painting the giraffes red and clean them up!”
Oh no, now it’s home time. I need to get everyone to go home. How shall I say this? I know!
“GET OUT OF MY ZOO!!!”
The Little Hippo By Catherine Caruth
It was a spring day at the zoo and because it was a Saturday it was very busy. But Little Hippo was sad because his dad has just died. “Don’t worry little hippo dad’s up in heaven” said his mum seeing that he looked upset.“Heaven?” Said Little Hippo, where’s Heaven?
“Up in the sky” replied mother Hippo.
“Up in the sky?” said Little Hippo to himself. “I have an idea.” So he sneaked some balloons from the balloon man, tied some to his arm, stood on the top of the penguins iceberg and was just about to jump when…..
“No Little Hippo don’t jump were are you going?” shouted his mum.
But Little Hippo did jump and shouted “I am going to see Dad in heaven.” Before Little Hippo knew he was flying higher and higher up into the clouds.
After a while the wind started to get stronger and stronger. Little Hippo grew scared and shouted for his dad. “DAD, DAD where are you?” Just then he flew onto a cloud and landed with a puff. “Oh dear,” Little Hippo said.
But then he heard a noise it was a loud voice it said: “LITTLE HIPPO DON’T BE SAD. I AM STILL HERE WITH YOU BUT YOU CAN’T SEE ME”.
“Dad!?” Little Hippo said with surprise.
“YES LITTLE HIPPO”
“But dad I want to come and see you!”
“I’M SORRY LITTLE HIPPO YOU CAN’T. BUT I WILL ALWAYS BE WITH YOU.”
“Are you sure Dad?” said Little Hippo.
“COMPLETELY SURE,” said his dad. “NOW YOU MUST GO BACK TO YOUR MUM AND YOU CAN COME AND VISIT ME SOON.”
“I will Dad, see you soon. Goodbye”.
“GOODBYE LITTLE HIPPO!”
So Little Hippo jumped of the cloud and floated down with his balloons. He soon reached the ground and there was his mum waiting for him.
“Mum, mum,” cried Little Hippo. “I saw Dad. Well I heard him and he said he will always be with us but we can’t see him,” puffed Little Hippo!
“Well that’s just great” said his mum “I was awfully worried about you.”
“Oh you didn’t need to worry about me Mum,” said Little Hippo.
“But you do look awfully grubby come on lets give you a bath.”
“OK” said Little Hippo and started to tell her all about his adventure and how he came across a big wind and how he landed on a cloud.
Little Hippo had just finished his bath and came out looking much cleaner. “That’s much better,” said his mum. “Now I think you should go to bed. You must be awfully tired after your long trip.”
But Little Hippo did not have to be told twice for he was very tired and hopped straight into bed. Good night Little Hippo. “Oh!” said his mum in surprise “he’s fallen asleep already!”
‘Make your Mind up Jerry!’ by Daniel Hudson
One day Jerry, a giraffe at the zoo, thought, ‘I don’t like the colour of the spots on my skin, I want them to be a different colour, I want to surprise our visitors and make the little children laugh’. So he leaned down and asked the Zookeeper “Can you get somebody to paint my brown spots yellow please?” The Zookeeper was amused at this strange request. “Are you sure Jerry?” he asked. Jerry thought for a moment. “Yes, let’s have a go”. The Zookeeper phoned the local painting company and asked if their tallest painter would come to the zoo immediately and bring plenty of different coloured paints!Shortly after a painter arrived. He was very small but he had a very long ladder! “So where is this giraffe you want me to paint?” he asked. The Zookeeper took the painter to Jerry. He began work straight away and climbed up to the top of the ladder to paint Jerry’s neck and climbed back down to paint Jerry’s feet.
When he had finished Jerry wandered out of the giraffe house and went to see his hippo friends. They fell about laughing. “You look like a big banana” they said. ‘Perhaps yellow is not my colour’ Jerry thought, and went to ask the painter to paint his spots red. “Make your mind up Jerry” said the painter and changed his spots to red.
When he had finished Jerry strode to see his panda friends. They fell about laughing. “You look like a big strawberry” they said. ‘Perhaps red is not my colour’ thought Jerry, and went to ask the painter to make his spots blue. “Make your mind up Jerry” said the painter and changed his spots to blue.
When he had finished Jerry dawdled out of the giraffe house and went to see his lion friends. They fell about laughing. “You look like a big grape” they said. ‘Perhaps blue is not my colour’ Jerry thought, and went to ask the painter to paint his spots orange. “Make your mind up Jerry” said the painter and changed his spots to orange.
When he had finished Jerry pounded out of the giraffe house and went to see his elephant friends. They fell about laughing. “You look like a big satsuma Jerry” they said. ‘Perhaps orange is not my colour’ Jerry thought , and went to ask the painter to make his spots brown. “Make your mind up Jerry” said the painter and changed his spots to brown.
When he had finished Jerry paced around the zoo park and nobody fell about laughing, everyone was friendly and just said “hi Jerry”.
When the painter had gone Jerry said to all the other animals “I think I’ll stick to being a brown spotted giraffe… for now anyway!”
Read the winning stories for the four- to seven-year-olds age category.
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sarha
on 15 February 2013good
I hate it it was boring
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chloe knight
on 19 October 2012The sun and the snow
Once upon a time there were a sun and the snow. They were boasting to each other about who was the strongest and cleverest. So the snow said to the sun the next person to come along we will have a competition, who ever gets their scarf on wins. "I bet I'll win said the sun I'm the stongest I'm the cleverest I'll win I will show you!" said the sun. "The snow said lets see". Just that second a young girl with blond long hair tied back in pig tails, with a lovely coat on walked down the road to get to her grandma's house. The sun boasted I'll go first. The sun shone hard on the little girl but she carried on walking and wiped her head. The snow was next to try and make her put her scarf on. The snow blew hard pails of snow fell on to the girl. The girl ,who's name was Chloe, went in to her bag and pulled out a red and black scarf and tied it around her neck and whispered "this is cold I hope it stops soon". The snow stopped and said I win, let's stop aguing and boasting and be friends.Moral: friendship gets you far in life
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treza
on 11 August 2012awesomeeee
these storys are going to change the world keep writing and i am 1111111111111111
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Leah
on 9 August 2011The Bee And The Bear !
ones thear lived a Bee and Bear the bee was called Billy and the Bear was called Bob billy and bob was best friends they went to the park with each other, they went to the Zoo together and they went home together UNTIL one day Bill came buzzing out of his house and knocked on Bobs door! BOB!! BOB! are you thear bob? he shouted , Billy buzzed up to the park but still thear was NO Bob he buzzed down to the zoo but still no Bob so Billy decided to go home!
Knock Knock billy got out of bed and buzzed down the stair ' I wonder whose at my door at this time in the morning ' billy said with buzzing exsitment! ( opens door ) OHHHH it was.......BOB!! 'bob what are you doing hear at this time in the morning ? ' billy said confusingly ' Oh I thought I would come and say I was sorry for not telling you I was-sent going to be thear yesterday ' Bob said sadly
'Thats ok come in for a cup or tea' billy said happily ( walked in the house and makes bob a cup of ea) 'Wear was you yesterday any way bob?' billy said happily ' oh I had to go to the doctors' bob said
BUT AS LONG AS WE ARE FRIENDS WELL THEN I LOVE YOU BOBI LOVE YOU TO BILLY
THE END
I hope you liked my story my story seemes babie ish but really this is a story i have already tiped this up on my lap top and it is for little children not big children like us :)
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Rose
on 6 August 2011Cool
They are brilliant you guys did great!! You all should keep on writting and NEVER GIVE IT UP!!! xx
5out of 5 -
Bob
on 9 May 2011:) :) :)
i think the stories were wonderful. I being 56 years old can`t write stories such as great. I almost began to cry why i read `the little hippo` Good job to all of you, and i hope you keep writing in the future. With your talent i know you have a chance in somthing big. Nice job everybody.
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elley
on 25 February 2011hiewd
i wanna be a writer write so many storys lool
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Fateema
on 29 October 2010The day i ran the zoo
it was amazing, all my cousin and i loved it i would give it 9 3/4 out of 10
4out of 5 -
aoife mullan
on 14 August 2010great :) !
I'm twelve years young and in second yeaar :) im more a fan of romantic stories but thought these stories were amazing ! i myself like to write and read, i hope that the writers of these storys continue to write and keep there imaginations open :]
4out of 5 -
Rachel from Woolooware Public School
on 25 June 2010Cool
I loved reading all of your stories, they were fantastic because you all had wonderful adjectives and sentence beginnings, I wish I could write like that!!!!!!
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Liv
on 5 June 2010ok
These stories were ok but some of the sentences didn't make sense, i like writing stories my self i have all-ready writen a few. And i am 11 years old.
2out of 5 -
claire
on 24 May 2010Ok
the stories were ok. i am 11 years old and a good story critic - i'm not super satisfied with these choices.
1out of 5 -
james
on 18 May 2010I liked them all
all the storys were great
3out of 5 -
Mohamed
on 30 April 2010Mohamed
I am ready to start and my name is Mohamed......
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mariam
on 8 April 2010all great
they were all brilliant it was 9/10
my favourite number 11out of 5 -
amy
on 1 February 2010great stories
i love all the stories, but i think one of the two runner ups should have won, but thats my own oppinion. GREAT JOB!!!!
Sarah
on 4 May 2017
Sarah
Good job everyone!!